Formal vs Informal mode from Superiors to Inferiors

I'm familiar with some aspects of formal and informal forms of speech from when I learned French. But that's the technical concept of the words and grammar, not necessarily the social usage of it amongst elves in Middle-earth.

I have a few questions about a person in a socially superior position meetings a social inferior.

I'll list different speech options and my understanding of the implications:

1) Both could use formal speech to each other. This would indicate respect for each other.

2) If the inferior were to start using informal speech to their superior, it would be rude. If the superior started using informal speech to their inferior, it would be rude and show a lack of respect.

3) If they were already friends, both could use informal speech with each other, in private or amongst a group of mutual friends. This would indicate friendship and respect for each other.

4) If, however, non-friends were present, would the use of informal speech by the inferior be acceptable? Or would it be unacceptable? Would the use of informal speech by the superior be acceptable as mark of friendship and respect, or would it be a social put-down showing a lack of respect to the inferior. Would use of informal speech by the inferior be acceptable AFTER their superior used informal speech to them?

5) Let's say the superior recognizes an immediate bond with an inferior they just met, or perhaps an ancestor or sibling of the inferior was a dear friend of the superior. Would asking the inferior to address them informally be a mark of respect and friendship? Or condescending? Or either, depending upon context? (Such as...)

Thanks!

Both could use formal speech to each other. This would indicate respect for each other.

Yes, but only if the two are not close. If they are friends, using formal language would add distance in the relationship and be cold and unfriendly.

If the superior started using informal speech to their inferior, it would be rude and show a lack of respect.

No, quite the contrary; a superior using informal language to an inferior would simply reinforce the hierarchical bond, and would not be disrespectful in any manner.

If, however, non-friends were present, would the use of informal speech by the inferior be acceptable?

Well, it depends. If this non-friend were a superior, formal speech would be used by default. However, if the non-friend were at the same level, informal speech could be used, give that those in the area are a relatively close-knit community (e.g. a little village). An example of this in reality would be Québec, where people would use the informal "you" ("tu") for nearly everyone because the community is close-knit. But of course if this is not the case, formal speech would be preferred.

Would use of informal speech by the inferior be acceptable AFTER their superior used informal speech to them?

No, informal speech used by a superior only shows the hierarchy of the relationship between the superior and inferior, and does not give the inferior permission to use informal speech. Informal speech could only be used if the inferior and superior were close with each other.

Let's say the superior recognizes an immediate bond with an inferior they just met, or perhaps an ancestor or sibling of the inferior was a dear friend of the superior. Would asking the inferior to address them informally be a mark of respect and friendship? Or condescending? Or either, depending upon context? (Such as...)

Definitely an acceptable mark of friendship; not condescending at all. It is quite normal for a superior to ask an inferior to refer/speak to them informally.

@Gwilithiel where are you getting this from? If it’s your intuition about the usage of such pronouns in any real-world language you know, that’s not a particularly good source, the actual social implications of those basic pronominal concepts can vary greatly between languages.

It depends a bit if you work in a -tye/-lye or a -(tye)/-lye/-tar paradigm.

In CQ [= Classical Quenya, not Common Quenderin] tye had gone out of use except in colloquial lan­guage where it was used chiefly among kinsfolk, but also as an endearment (esp. between lovers). When used by par­ents to children there was nothing "imperious" about it – for children used tye to parents and grandparents etc. – to use the adult lye was more stern. Cf. tyenya ('my tye') dear kinsman. When Pippin used the form (the pronouns were borrowed from Quenya into Common Speech) to Denethor it was amusing because it was treating him as if he was Pip­pin's grandfather. (VT49/51)

So from that we get:

• lye is the default.
• tye is a special marker of closeness, but is not usually used to emphasis social differences – Pippin got to keep his head for calling Denethor tye after all. That is however undoubtedly also connected to Pippins size.

So I’d say variant (1) is definitely the default.

Peregrin Took, for instance, in his first few days in Minas Tirith used the familiar for people of all ranks, including the Lord Denethor himself. This may have amused the aged Steward, but it must have astonished his servants. No doubt this free use of the familiar forms helped to spread the popular rumour that Peregrin was a person of very high rank in his own country. (LR50/1133)

I would read this less as “nobles usually go around and tye anyone they meet”, but rather “That Pippin could even presume to have close ties to Lord Denethor must mean that he is some kind of lord, surely the Steward doesn’t have lowly friends”.

I’d argue (2) is rude in both directions, presuming a closeness that there isn’t. Naturally socially superior individuals can get away with doing rude things more often, but from the description it doesn’t seem like it was a standard way to disrespect someone. The only contrary notion I could find is “two different pronouns for the 2nd person sg. (not pl.), the one imperious or familiar, the other polite” (PE17/135), but since this discusses commonalities between Quenya and Sindarin, this might primarily refer to the pre-Classical situation.

(3) probably yes if they are very close friends.

(4) On a formal occasion or if others might disapprove of the relationship perhaps still lye, in other contexts the situation feels a bit constructed.

(5) as I read the quotes, tye needs at least a bit time. But with Elves there are of course things like forsight, osanwe, kinship of the fear and reincarnation, that could influence the percieved closeness to a persons dramatically in quite a short time.

I mostly based my response on the information in Gelio Edhellen, with some things taken from my experience with French, but you're definitely right that I should have looked into more research regarding Middle Earth usage before responding.

While it’s still dangerous to extrapolate from French, the situation for Sindarin might indeed be different from what I outlined for Quenya above. The only evidence we have though seems to be Glorfindel’s mae g(ī)‘ovannen to Aragorn.

Yeah, and even mae g(ī)‘ovannen is shaky, as to my knowledge the last thing Tolkien said regarding that greeting phrase was that govannen was the past participle of S. cova-, so it doesn't seem completely certain that the greeting was a usage of informal speech at all (of course, I am aware that there is a chance that mae g(ī)‘ovannen is preserved).